he's free

"i'm waking up at the

"i'm waking up at the start of the end of the world,

but i'm feeling like any other over-it girl,

except that maybe i actually care

and you darling, you're still nowhere."

-is

you know what drives me bonkers?

the thought that someone, somewhere might be thinking of me.

i know it's something we've all processed through our heads, but have we really taken the time to realize what this means?

this goes beyond the mundane text/facebook/twitter messages of "thinking of you". i gag.

what i'm talking about is someone who truly thinks of you and acts out on it. for example (very trivial): "hey, remember that book you mentioned 3 months ago? well i know its random but i picked it up and i loved it! thanks!" at no point did this person tell me that they bought the book, much less me tell them to buy it. it came up in conversation, i quoted a line (which i'm infamous for doing) and voila! someone listened. acted. and probably thought of little me whilest reading this piece of art.

wouldn't it be something wonderful if we knew the wonderful (and only wonderful) consequences of our words and actions? far too little we give people credit for our progression.

although i'm considered social and verbal and down right a "people person" (eck!), i have the mind set that people never think of me. this belief does not stem from insecurity or ego (lack thereof). i believe it stems from indifference, and that my friends is a scary thought. perhaps i give my dog more credit than i give myself... i constantly think everyone loves, cherishes and thinks of that golden monster.

"take someone who doesn't keep score, who's not looking to be richer, or afraid of losing, who has not the slightest interest even in his own personality: he's free" - rumi