around my finger twirl

so, i found this in a journal. i was twenty when i wrote this. perchance i was listening to too much alanis morrisette and dashboard confessionals. (sigh)

_knees_

i wanted to be the one who would make you and break you.
she did that, now i guess i have to be the one who mends you and takes you.

i was waiting for the day to come
for me to wake up and find you undone
i'd unthread your perfect world and make your confusion around my finger twirl
i wish i couldve been that girl.

so you've turned your back on this unfortunate misery
and found yourself face to face with me
i gave all my past pride away to make sure you'd have somewhere to stay
i wish my heart wouldnt beat this way
i wish there was something less i could say

there was so much left undiscovered
reality got in my way and made me wonder.
so now your tears are her own
she's starting anew and left you alone
pick me up, lift me up, hear me now, i'm on the phone

i would tell you something insightful, delightful, exciteful
build up your crumbling walls
i'd thank you and breathe you and look at you
turn around and walk away. i wasnt meant to stay.

are you happy, are you happy now.
when i picked your face up from the ground
is this what you want? what you need?
seeing me back on my knees.

-is